New Year

Here's a look at the good things and blessings that happened this year as well as the parts that I'd like to forget and hope for a better future.

I'll start with random 2011 memories that I remember at this moment.

Ambition of seeking healthy brownies: Brownies are easy and good to bake when I want a sweet treat. Plus, they make my home smell delightful. I heard about substituting avocado for butter and browsed several blogs that mention the brownies tasting better more moist, better texture with the avocado. I was convinced and gave it a try. I pulled out the brownies from the oven and it looked great. When I bit into it, it was absolutely DISGUSTING. It was this weird rubbery, tasteless thing. Later, I tried again with yogurt and applesauce. It didn't work out either. I may have done something wrong. By this time, I gave up and going to stick to brownies the traditional way with butter and sugar. Healthy brownies are an oxymoron.

Susan Reese's Writing to Heal Journal - Often I wished I could take a look at myself from the outside, especially my inner mind, thoughts, personality, and the unseen. This class helped me. One of the course requirements were to make a scrapbook/journal of myself — my views, journeys, experiences. Throughout the term, I make this journal. Each page is varied in mood, tone, thoughts, experiences. I was recalling things that I took for granted and revisited old experiences and memories. Looking at the finished product, I could really take a good look at myself. I believe our God is the author and finisher of our faith. I can see how He brought me into existence and writing my life.

Talking about my Writing - I am glad to be plugged in with the writing community. I enjoy the monthly writer group meeting where we end up discussing ideas, readings, and the many opportunities to talk to like-minded people about writing. I took classes that had me talk about myself as a writer. It sharpened my vision and helped me write.

Overload of work, grad school, social life, and everything else - I decided to graduate this year and took a heavy load of courses. I'm a full-time grad student, have 3 part-time jobs that total to 35 hours (so basically it's like having one full-time job), and involved on campus. I still made time to workout, socialize, go to church and of course sleep. I got straight As all the way. It was hard! I honestly don't know how I did it. I didn't burn out because I scheduled time to relax and socialize or else I would lose my mind! I could manage this till I graduate this year. But this is not what I want for longer time. I'm a very active person, yet I acknowledge my limitations.

Relationships - In the journey of life, there are fellow travellers. Some stay with you the entire course while others are there for a short term. There are reasons for that. Some people should never be in your life. This year, I had people come in and leave. I see a purpose why it happens and different people of completely opposite backgrounds and experiences are coming into my life to make it a blessing. Acquaintances have their place. Professional connections have their place. However, I do not want my friends to be perpetual acquaintances. I'm the kind of person who prefers having a small group of people who I can trust my life rather than being in a crowd of acquaintances that are apparently my friends.

So I run into you in a supermarket after 2 years and you say "Oh I've been thinking about you...blah blah...I've been praying for you....Let's meet up." And this is the funniest part. You had my contact info all this time. Why didn't you bother to take a minute to chat? It isn't that difficult. I take their words with a grain of salt and don't take them seriously until they actually call me or take at least one minute of their precious time to really get to know me. Please buzz off. I'd rather have you say nothing than insincere, empty fluff.

I had someone tell me, "You're one straight up, no BS type of girl." That's true. I may greet a person when I see them and polite. But, I never say "let's hang out" or act interested when I am not. If I'm not interested in a person I just say nothing and stay out of the way. That's the way I roll.

I am glad for the people in my life. I am also understanding of some people who I need to cut off. Ideally, I don't want to, but sometimes that is how it goes. It can be very difficult. I decided it's better to not focus on them, but rather people who are genuinely interested in me, involved and who I continually spend time with. There are people like that. I am glad for those who took the time to speak into my life, rebuke me when I do something dumb, encourage me during tough situations, and hang out with.

Dating - So you knew this was coming. I don't like to gossip the juicy details about my relational life on an open internet blog out of respect. I don't like to share about my relationship details openly. I only discuss with my best friends and close family members. If you want drama, juicy gossip and voyeur into someone's personal life, there are countless reality TV shows. Go watch them instead.

With this, I chose this year. I spent New Years Eve having dinner with my family and then going to a party with my friends. I'm glad to be in a fun, safe party with people I care about, love, and trust. We had a great time.

Things I look forward to in 2012

Graduation from PSU. I will have my Master's degree in Writing: Publishing. Now please don't ask me what I'm going to do with that degree or what I want to do with my life.

Life after Graduation. I am working on having a job lined up and hopefully like several other people, I'm hoping for it. I'm going to see what happens.

Self eye-brow threading. My sister discovered how to self thread eyebrows. I was surprised to find out how easy it was. I got it right away and I only need a piece of ordinary thread. No more visits to the salon. I can do it myself!

Writing. I'm still working on Exile and still going. I will have more to write. I'm thankful for my writers group for their support.

My Gym Life. I somewhat backslid on my gym workouts. It's the holidays and it's okay to take a break. In 2011, I was very consistent. I found physical activities I enjoy like dancing, tennis, swimming, and weightlifting. I like variety in my workouts. I will continue this year, but will crank up the intensity and focusing on dieting. I don't mean dieting as in starving or those temporary fad diets. I mean dieting as a lifestyle for life. I am planning to avoid processed foods as much as possible, quality protein, good fats, and balance. I have to get better at planning and making meals that are healthy.

Personal Finance. Sadly, many young women (my generation) do not understand finance. Budgeting, debt, mortgage, investing. I think that's unfortunate. I studied personal finance through Suze Orman, Brass magazine (a money magazine for young adults), and Dave Ramsey. I took Dave Ramsey course through my church, Imago Dei Community, because I was intrigued when another guy I know told me that he paid off a 45K student loan in 14 months after taking that course. That sure sounds good to me. I look forward to learning to be better disciplined about my finances, repenting when I messed up, and being financially knowledgeable and healthy.

Saturdays Off. Last term, I did not have one day a week off. I was either in school or working. I wanted at least one day where I don't have to go a class or scheduled to work. This is where I can sleep in, clean my apartment, get organized, homework and read for leisure, write or pursue other creative endeavors, and relax!

So here's to a new year!